"Where I Wanna Be"

Ok. I do some major thinking before I write these. This one again is an introspective RANT. However, hopefully, you can somehow relate. If you really don't care, that's kewl, too!!...

I've been known my entire life as being a "Jack of all Trades". I do many things outside of the "Arts", but they are my primary "go-to's". I can draw and paint, and design, and act, and sing and yadda yadda yadda. Others tell me that I'm really good at each and I agree. BUT, I feel as if I haven't tapped into that "genius" or that "Gold Star" quality in any of them. When I do something, I do it to the best of my ability during that time. Sometimes when I don't do my best, others consider it to be superior. I don't know if it's because they are uninformed of the skill or craft, or if my work is really as good as they say it is. I'm not putting any of my talents down. I just believe that if I dedicated my time and energy to just one of those talents for about a year or two, I'd REALLY be a force to be reckoned with. I always aspire to be better than what I am. I don't want to get into the position of being complacent. When that happens, the growth STOPS. I can't let that happen. There are many artist whom I admire. My MOST RECENT interest is Esperanza Spalding. She's a jazz bassist and singer, who draws upon many genres in her own compositions. She just recently won a Grammy for "Best New Artist", making her the first jazz artist to win the award. She's also a teacher at Berklee College of Music, from where she graduated. She's taught there for 5 years. She's 26.............You do the math. Music was her focus. She may not know HOW to do ANYTHING ELSE. But, there's no denying that she is incredible at what she does. I know there's more to the story, but I would like to be THAT focused on ONE talent and make it exceptional. I know I have the potential. I even believe that I do. I'm just kinda TIRED of only HAVING it. Being the "Jack of all Trades" is starting to get old. I do, however, enjoy being able to have the ability to do multiple things well. I would just like to be a master of one of them. Is that asking for too much? I don't think so. My goal is to focus my attention on one of my talents. Which one? The world will soon see. And I'll keep the others up to par in the process. ;) I just think that it's MY TIME. You know?

I don't want to come off like some pretentious jerk. I am genuinely concerned about this aspect of my life. I have a problem with mediocracy. So when I see myself slip into it, I'm not ok. I just gotta get this outta my head. Thank you for your time if you've read along this far.